Overcoming a Feeling of Rejection – Part 1
The tall, slender man sits uncomfortably in a crowded room his eyes darting here and there, avoiding the eyes of others. Having worked hard all his life he is now retired, and even though he seems drawn to me there is a wall that I can’t penetrate. His childhood has left him scarred and suspicious of people; even his children and grandchildren are kept at a distance. I think of those who have overcome rejection by abusive parents and wonder why so many are held prisoner by this painful taskmaster – rejection.
Many see themselves as the rejects of society, and wonder why they were ever born. Often they find their way to a church, receive Jesus as Savior. For a period of time they feel accepted but soon the old tapes of rejection began playing the refrain that they aren’t good enough, that no one likes them and their very thoughts attract rejection again and again. The one place they thought was safe reinforces the core belief that was instilled in them as children.
Rejection by those in the Body of Christ is especially cruel. Those with rejection sensitivity suffer an identity crisis, which opens the door for conflict. Your feelings reveal how you think about yourself. Negative thoughts produce negative feelings which can be changed. As a follower of Jesus, you have an opportunity to erase old tapes that have played in your mind for a long time and you can replace negative thoughts with God-thoughts. The follower of Christ is free to make choices.
Truth is: You were mistreated by caregivers, but now you are accepted in the Beloved, and you are now a partaker of God’s nature. He chose you before the foundation of the world before you did anything good or bad. You are now in a position to receive the healing Jesus provided. He came to bind up and heal your broken heart.
Sometimes we are naïve and think that every fellow believer walks in love, and a brother or sister will never hurt or reject us. Then we discover that there are people in the church with unhealed hurts and unresolved issues, and if we have not resolved a feeling and/or thoughts of rejection we carry, we will perceive rejection even when none is intended.
Your mind has not been born again and will have to be renewed. You are accepted by the God of the universe who makes wonderful affirmative statements about you. He looked at His handiwork, His masterpiece – YOU, and He clothed you in beautiful garments, crowned you with loving-kindness and tender mercies.
Your Heavenly Father saw you and approved of you even while you were in your mother’s womb (Ps. 139:13-16). He gave you survival tools that would bring you to the place where you are today and you are here by divine appointment. He is a Father Who has been waiting for you to come home to truth — the truth that will set you free (John 8:32).
Self-rejection is probably the most destructive form of rejection. When you feel secure and self-assured about yourself, and your identification is centered in Christ Jesus, you will realize that the rejection of others does not have the power to dictate who you are or change your behavior. You will be a witness to their hurt rather than becoming entangled in their insecurities.
Future perceived rejection may hurt, but it will be only for a season. (1 Pet. 1:6.) The Word of God is your shield against all the fiery darts of the devil (Eph. 6:16,17).
For victory over your feeling of rejection, I encourage you to pray the following prayer in faith every morning and evening, more often when you need more reinforcement.
Father, I come to You in the name of Jesus. I acknowledge Jesus as my High Priest and Lord. Lord Jesus, it is comforting to know that You understand and sympathize with my weaknesses and this excruciating pain of rejection. Today I approach the Throne of grace with confidence, so that I may receive mercy and find grace to help in my time of need. I ask You to forgive my sins, and I receive Your mercy; I expect Your healing grace to dispel the rejection I am suffering because of the false accusations and demeaning actions of others. Also, forgive me for self-hatred and thinking that I’m less than others. It’s awesome to understand that I’m created in Your image. Everything You make is good.
Jesus, You were despised and rejected — a Man of Sorrows, acquainted with bitter grief. The grief of (name them)turning against me and treating me as an outcast has consumed me, just as my rejection consumed You.
Forgive me for turning my back on You and looking the other way. When you were despised, I didn’t care. Yet it was my grief You bore, my sorrows that weighed You down. You were wounded and bruised for my sins. You were beaten that I might have peace; You were lashed, and with Your stripes I was healed.
In the face of rejection I am declaring, “The Lord is my Light and my Salvation — whom shall I fear or dread? The Lord is the Refuge and Stronghold of my life — of whom shall I be afraid?” (Ps. 27:1 amp).
I know right from wrong and cherish Your laws in my heart; I won’t be afraid of people’s scorn or their slanderous talk. Slanderous talk is temporal and fades away. Your Word will never pass away.
Father, I choose to look at the things that are eternal: Your justice and mercy shall last forever, and Your salvation from generation to generation. Your eyes are upon me, for I have right standing with You, and Your ears are attentive to my prayer.
In my heart I set You apart as holy [and acknowledge You, Jesus] as Lord. I am always ready to give a logical defense to anyone who asks me to account for the hope that is in me, but I do it courteously and respectfully. I purpose [to see to it that] my conscience is entirely clear (unimpaired), so that, when I am falsely accused as an evildoer, those who threaten me abusively and revile my right behavior in Christ may come to be ashamed [of slandering my good life].
You chose me before the foundation of the world and I am accepted by you, my Father. I give you all the glory in the name of Your precious Son, Jesus!
Based on Overcoming a Feeling of Rejection from
Prayers That Avail Much® 25th Anniversary Commemorative Edition
ISBN 1-57794-752-5 (Formerly ISBN 0-89274-950-4)
Copyright © 1997 by Germaine Copeland
Part 2 Coming Soon
Germaine Copeland is the author of the best selling book series, Prayers That Avail Much. She has written scriptural prayers for the family. Read your Bible, pray and attend church where you can soak up the love and faith of God. You will receive emotional healing, experience spiritual growth and become more intimately acquainted with your Heavenly Father, and your relationships will grow stronger.